I think it’s important to know someone and their story in order to truly understand how they have come to believe what they do. There have been so many things happening in our country at warp speed that my brain has barely had time to process. What I’ve been able to process are these words I hold dear to my heart: “God who knows our hearts and weighs our souls, knows we know and holds us responsible to Act.”-Proverbs 24:12. For better or for worse these words are tattooed on my wrist as a reminder that, I believe God has called me to a life of action. To seek justice, love mercy and walk humbly with God. Love, compassion, conviction—these “feelings” are all, in fact, actions. But, goodness knows we’ve seen that many of us carry different ideas of how these feelings should be acted out deep within us.
I thought I would take a step back. I’ve noticed the friends who believe differently than I do when I see them in public...I've seen their body language change when we’re together, and even….seen the friends slowly unfriending me. I’ve been guilty of it too…in person, my body tenses up…online, my fingers get excited and click ‘unfollow’ at an exorbitant rate. Now—it’s Facebook—it’s a social media world…it’s not truly reality. And truly…mind are not changed by my posts or yours. But, the culture we’ve created leads one to feel sad when the ‘unfriend’ button is clicked. There’s also nothing more real than the body language between two people when you know you fall on different ends of the spectrum on these very deeply rooted issues and each one is nervous to engage in conversation…so you just remain silent and slowly…the friendship looses some layers. Believe it or not…this is happening right now. Not just to me…I see it happening to other friends and family as well. Division…with each change…with each refresh of our homepage.
Now…for the step back…it’s dawned on me that perhaps people don’t know me well enough to know why so many of these issues might cut as deeply as they do. AND I don't entirely know why others think as they do either...but I can only start with me. I know merely saying, “I’m a follower of Jesus” does not transcend to all sides…those disillusioned to church certainly don’t get that and those who are Christians who fall on the opposite end of the spectrum do not necessarily hear that either. SO…Let me introduce myself.
I was born Regina Gail Rigney. To two parents from rural South Carolina, just outside of Charleston. Both of my parents were professional musicians and eventually my father went into the United States Air Force and my mother became a Church Choir Director and Head of Christian Education primarily working in The United Methodist Church. I was born on the island of Guam where I lived till I was 2 and then moved to Italy where I lived till I was 6. I never even lived in the U.S. till I was in the 1st grade! I only lived in the U.S. for 2 1/2 years before moving back overseas to Panama where I lived till I was 10. In Panama, I served people within the community living in poverty alongside my mother and took Typical Panamanian Dance lessons. I moved to rural Alabama for one year, following my fathers retirement and then moved to New Orleans, LA where my family still lives. I grew up attending Isidore Newman School, a college preparatory school that was initially founded as a Manual Training School for Jewish Orphans in 1903. About 40% of the students I attended school with were Jewish. Upon graduating high school I attended two universities, Belmont University in Nashville and Oklahoma City University both of which were Christian affiliated. I completed my Bachelors of Music in Musical Theatre and Dance and attended two years of Seminary and worked as a Junior High Youth Minister before moving to Los Angeles where I danced in a Modern Ballet Company and served LOTS and I mean LOTS of tables. I also did some time serving at an orphanage in Sierra Leone, West Africa and helped to start an non-profit called Firefleyes building creative arts rooms and providing creative arts and sports components for already established orphanages. Upon moving back to Nashville, for a short time, I worked for a non-profit as a Volunteer Coordinator working with the unhoused community and finally settled into being a Children’s Ministry Director. I met and married my awesome husband, native to Tennessee, and moved into his house in rural Tennessee. I served at a church a short time where I was quickly let go for many reasons that seemed to be pointed strongly at the fact that I was a new mother. Currently, I am working as an Administrative Assistant at a large church outside of Nashville and I am finishing my Masters in Religion and beginning the Ordination process in the United Methodist Church with hopes of working in missions and outreach and congregational care. AND…I have, who I believe to be, the cutest and smartest 17 month old ever. :-) You may think…what does that matter right now?? I think it matters a lot. Potentially, you know more about the experiences I might have had that have shaped my views to lean very heavily on care for the outcast (ie refugees), you might know why I feel strongly about rights for all people (including the LGTBQ community)…living in rural Tennessee you can see how I might be around a good amount of people who think differently than I do. Seeing as I am seeking ordination and the UMC has only ordained women for 50 years maybe sheds insight into why I might feel strongly about women’s rights. Since I grew up at a Jewish affiliated school, with friends whom I love dearly who are Jewish, you may know why I could have been DEEPLY offended by the Holocaust Remembrance Day speech that lumped all those effected into some crock pot, as if everyone was just as effected as our Jewish brothers and sisters and why I believe this to be another example of belittling a group of people our society as deemed as "other." Knowing that I held dying babies in Africa sheds a piece of insight into why hearing stories of refugee families with no place to go shatters my heart and has led me to be staunchly against this ban. Serving alongside my mother as a 9 year old in Panama shapes my desire for people to know that no matter who are or what you believe or how uncomfortable it makes me…I desire to show you God’s love and for you to know that you are always welcome in my home...even if we think differently. AND…knowing that I grew up as the child of a United States Air Force Officer perhaps helps you know that I do, in fact, care about this country. But, I do not believe myself to be first a U.S. citizen, or a Republican or Democrat…I’m first and foremost a follower of Jesus Christ….and I’m doing the best I can in a space and time where there are heart breaking, earth shattering things occurring.
I’ll take a step forward and say that I think we all need to take a step back and look at one another’s stories. We will never understand each others perspectives if we just press the unfollow button or the unfriend button and allow ourselves to be covered in our own bubbles once more. I’ve seen lots of posts saying “Can we all just go back to pictures of babies and puppies.” The answer is….no (though don’t worry…I’ll still post plenty of baby pictures, hah) There is too much going on right now that MATTERS and the stakes are too high… EVEN if you agree with the POTUS and his administration…you cannot deny the division around us. And a mere eye roll is not going to fix it. Love. Understanding. Brutally Hard Conversations, RECONCILIATION. These are the things that are going to fix it. And, yes, my friends…ACTION. People stating their opinions. No, social media is NOT the correct forum to CHANGE someone else's minds…but it is a means with which to put out what you strive to be about. Real life conversations can and should be prompted by those posts but…we have to be willing to do more than give awkward body language…we have to be willing to engage…in love and respect. Love and respect, rooted in a space where we MUST assume our FRIENDS to be coming from a good place. Let’s look at our friends stories (PLEASE share yours with me!) before we start slicing and dicing our village….that’s the kind of division that will actually build a wall. A free one.
